i'm gonna call you pH 10 cuz you basic

19th October 2014

Photo reblogged from The Ravenclaw Next Door with 323,476 notes

lettersfromtitan:

aleksandrwilde:

jinxamataz:

commissarcuddles:

hexane-nightmares:

Holy fuck. I never really understood how they caught birds before, I assumed they had to sneak up on them. 

How was this even caught on camera?

did that cat fucking put the thing in its mouth in midair so it could land on its feet

Did you know that pound for pound, house cats are THE most efficient land predators?

Cats are better than you.

lettersfromtitan:

aleksandrwilde:

jinxamataz:

commissarcuddles:

hexane-nightmares:

Holy fuck. I never really understood how they caught birds before, I assumed they had to sneak up on them. 

How was this even caught on camera?

did that cat fucking put the thing in its mouth in midair so it could land on its feet

Did you know that pound for pound, house cats are THE most efficient land predators?

Cats are better than you.

Source: kittiezandtittiez

19th October 2014

Photo reblogged from geronimo with 714,088 notes

marionisamuffin:

pleasantandcain:

fromladytolifter:

candidlycara:

dance-in-the-shadows:

gracediamondsfear:

wifeyknowsbest:

whatapreciouslittlefuckfox:


A sense of humor can make everything better. Sex isn’t like it is in the movies or in porn. There will be strange and weird and awkward sounds, there might be a silly interruption like the cat or a kid… you might knock heads or trip getting undressed. Sex is funny, foreplay is funny and sometimes you need to just laugh. It will keep things from getting awkward! If you take sex too seriously you aren’t truly enjoying it!
Not to mention a sense of humor can be really sexy no matter what your gender identity is!

this comic is literally my favorite thing on tumblr.

i’ve always said if you can’t laugh with the person you’re having sex with while you’re having sex with them you shouldn’t be having sex with them.

God.
My husband once walked up behind me while i was sitting in the living room just watching t.v…and he put his penis on my shoulder and said “hello..”
THIS WAS HIS SEDUCTION.
THIS WAS HIS IDEA OF HOW TO GET ME INTO BED.
it worked, but not before I laughed for days.

For that last comment.

I always had a ton of weird funky condoms at my place because I volunteered with Planned Parenthood and did a lot of sex education and sex positive work. I literally had no less than like thirty different types of condoms at a time. So when it came time to grabbing a condom it was a grab bag of WHO KNOWS what you’ll end up with.
Long story short, my boyfriend grabs one, puts it on, heat of the moment type thing, a some point we both look down and see it’s an ELECTRIC GREEN condom. Dead pan he looks me straight in the eye and in his best impression goes “HEY HO. KERMIT DEE FROG HERE.” And I COMPLETELY LOST IT.
On a completely different occasion I said “don’t stop” and he sang ALL of Don’t Stop Believing. All of it. All of it. Right then and there. Without stopping.

Can I add the story about how me and one of my partners had a very enthralling discussion about deserts while I was on top of him?
Or the time my partner’s friends blasted “Eye of the Tiger” through the door and we rocked it out to the beat while quoting the movie?

Story time:
I was with this girl during a trip out to Washington, we’d hung out a few times, and hit it off really well. So we got together one afternoon. Her dorm-mate came home, saw the “Do Not Disturb” sock on her bedroom door and called out “Thrusters to full!”
Not missing a beat the girl and I yelled back “We’re giving it all we’ve got, Captain!” and her roommate started fucking dying outside the door.
Probably should have proposed right on the spot, but whatever.

It got better.

marionisamuffin:

pleasantandcain:

fromladytolifter:

candidlycara:

dance-in-the-shadows:

gracediamondsfear:

wifeyknowsbest:

whatapreciouslittlefuckfox:

A sense of humor can make everything better. Sex isn’t like it is in the movies or in porn. There will be strange and weird and awkward sounds, there might be a silly interruption like the cat or a kid… you might knock heads or trip getting undressed. Sex is funny, foreplay is funny and sometimes you need to just laugh. It will keep things from getting awkward! If you take sex too seriously you aren’t truly enjoying it!

Not to mention a sense of humor can be really sexy no matter what your gender identity is!

this comic is literally my favorite thing on tumblr.

i’ve always said if you can’t laugh with the person you’re having sex with while you’re having sex with them you shouldn’t be having sex with them.

God.

My husband once walked up behind me while i was sitting in the living room just watching t.v…and he put his penis on my shoulder and said “hello..”

THIS WAS HIS SEDUCTION.

THIS WAS HIS IDEA OF HOW TO GET ME INTO BED.

it worked, but not before I laughed for days.

For that last comment.

I always had a ton of weird funky condoms at my place because I volunteered with Planned Parenthood and did a lot of sex education and sex positive work. I literally had no less than like thirty different types of condoms at a time. So when it came time to grabbing a condom it was a grab bag of WHO KNOWS what you’ll end up with.

Long story short, my boyfriend grabs one, puts it on, heat of the moment type thing, a some point we both look down and see it’s an ELECTRIC GREEN condom. Dead pan he looks me straight in the eye and in his best impression goes “HEY HO. KERMIT DEE FROG HERE.” And I COMPLETELY LOST IT.

On a completely different occasion I said “don’t stop” and he sang ALL of Don’t Stop Believing. All of it. All of it. Right then and there. Without stopping.

Can I add the story about how me and one of my partners had a very enthralling discussion about deserts while I was on top of him?

Or the time my partner’s friends blasted “Eye of the Tiger” through the door and we rocked it out to the beat while quoting the movie?

Story time:

I was with this girl during a trip out to Washington, we’d hung out a few times, and hit it off really well. So we got together one afternoon. Her dorm-mate came home, saw the “Do Not Disturb” sock on her bedroom door and called out “Thrusters to full!”

Not missing a beat the girl and I yelled back “We’re giving it all we’ve got, Captain!” and her roommate started fucking dying outside the door.

Probably should have proposed right on the spot, but whatever.

It got better.

Source: erospainter

19th October 2014

Post reblogged from A Story Yet Unwritten with 99,933 notes

notenoughsockmonkeys:

So my parents bought me this thing called the Selfie Stick

image

And pretty much you attach your phone to the stick and you can take pictures using the little clicker thing. So instead of taking photos like this:

image

I can take photos like this:

image

Source: notenoughsockmonkeys

19th October 2014

Photo reblogged from Womp. with 104,100 notes

stunningpicture:

Out having a pint with a friend when my wife sent me this.

stunningpicture:

Out having a pint with a friend when my wife sent me this.

Source: stunningpicture

19th October 2014

Photoset reblogged from Mikey with 332,638 notes

asian-fitspiration:

kyliesparks27:

monkeysaysficus:

This is rude

THIS IS GODDAMN OFFENSIVE YOU MEAN

It’s 1:30am so here’s some porn for all ya fellas

Source: maleficent-z

19th October 2014

Photo reblogged from Devil Take the Hindmost with 184,362 notes

loki-has-a-tardis:

This is honestly the best poster I have found in a while supporting breast cancer awareness. I am honestly so sick of seeing, “set the tatas free” and “save the boobies”. There is no reason in hell a life threatening, life ruining disease should be sexualized. “Don’t wear a bra day,” go fuck yourselves. You’re not saving a pair of tits, you’re saving the entire package: mind, body, and soul included. Women are not just a pair of breasts.

loki-has-a-tardis:

This is honestly the best poster I have found in a while supporting breast cancer awareness. I am honestly so sick of seeing, “set the tatas free” and “save the boobies”. There is no reason in hell a life threatening, life ruining disease should be sexualized. “Don’t wear a bra day,” go fuck yourselves. You’re not saving a pair of tits, you’re saving the entire package: mind, body, and soul included. Women are not just a pair of breasts.

Source: loki-has-a-tardis

19th October 2014

Post reblogged from are you out of your cornfed mind? with 7,982 notes

experimentalmadness:

And you know what.

Shout out to bisexual individuals who haven’t been in any relationships yet, or have only ever been in a relationship with one gender.

You don’t owe anyone any kind of explanation about your identity.

You are amazing and wondrously bisexual just the way you are.

Source: experimentalmadness

19th October 2014

Photo reblogged from woohoo. with 2,575 notes

Source: fuckyeahdementia

19th October 2014

Photo reblogged from Portia The Destroyer with 739,515 notes

i-am-matticus:

havea-nicedaze:

c0urtneys:

b0mbb:

wall-flawer:

rip-aaliyah:

man, i don’t think i’ll ever get over this picture. 

Someone please make this a gif with the stars moving or sparkling!!

Oh my gosh this is amazing

wow

No one realizes that this is what the sky is supposed to look like but we fucked it up congrats earth

That looks like heaven

i-am-matticus:

havea-nicedaze:

c0urtneys:

b0mbb:

wall-flawer:

rip-aaliyah:

man, i don’t think i’ll ever get over this picture. 

Someone please make this a gif with the stars moving or sparkling!!

Oh my gosh this is amazing

wow

No one realizes that this is what the sky is supposed to look like but we fucked it up congrats earth

That looks like heaven

Source: fieldguidetobirds

19th October 2014

Photoset reblogged from Portia The Destroyer with 158,140 notes

Source: beben-eleben